Sorry readers that I haven't posted in a while. I'm still reeling a little bit. I learned that some coworkers while on a business trip called out my blog as a sorta of a joke, and apparently they proceeded to laugh at me and the personal nuances of my life's stories. I'm normally not bothered by this but the people involved... I was a little surprised that I was such an easy joke to them. Anyways, I could be wrong but that's something that's hard to get over. I'm hoping that I can push on because there are bigger goals at stake that are the reasons why I write so personally.
On some good news! Yes, I will on occasion throw in a an exclamation mark. Okay... I do it all the time. So sue me! Back to the good news. I have a buyer for my house and contracts have been signed!!! Yay! All we have to do is go through the appraisal process and then hand it over on May 31st. No more crippling mortgage. Italy in October, here I come!
Top 10 list of things that will happen in my life:
10: I will own a boat/sea doo of some kind (Why else would I have gotten an FJ Cruiser)
9: I will travel around the world, starting in Italy
8: I will be handed VIP tickets to something just because I'm important
7: I will fall for a beautiful woman that I can lavish to death
6: I will become closer to my brother and sister
5: I will get into acting again, somehow, someway
4: I will own a place again, whether it be a house, loft or condo
3: I will live off a beach, pref. in Florida
2: I will have kids (I have a goal that I want to adopt at least one kid who is having a hard time getting adopted)
1: I will fall in love again, I've got plenty of time though
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
A New Challenge
Tomorrow will start my two weeks of working out and not drinking. Why you ask? I feel like it. It seems like I went forever without drinking only to return to my drinking ways after the divorce. I'm testing myself to see if I have the will power to go out and not drink. I actually tend to have more fun without drinking but I know it makes others more comfortable if I do. Anyways... here it goes.
Also... I'm excited because I might have a couple buying my house. That would be great.
Also... I'm excited because I might have a couple buying my house. That would be great.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Frat Guy Friday
Some of us at our office do theme fridays. Today's theme was inspired by the bra below. Pictures of us to come. If you see a douche bag walking down the hall it is probably either me, Adam or Corey. Even Nick Davis is rocking the double popped-collars.
To the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas —
Two popped-collars, one upside down visor, and douche bag looking like meeeeeee!
Thursday, April 24, 2008
That Terrible Premonition
I'm still haunted by yet another dream where I die while I'm sleeping. I've gotten one of those dreams every seven or eight years. I remember them all very vividly. I remember one when I was young where I took a shotgun blast to the face and it was so real I could taste the sulfur in my teeth. The dream I had the other night was just as vivid.
My dream started with me on a plane heading home. I had a feeling of accomplishment but that of loneliness as well. I could tell I was decked out in work clothes and I was blankly staring out of the plane. I remember hearing some really loud gasps and then a free fall ensued. I looked out the window and saw that we were going to smash into some trees. I braced myself against the airplane wall and was hurled into every imaginable direction. I woke up looking into the sky. I couldn't figure out why I couldn't move my legs or my arms. I tried to move anything but I couldn't. I could speak but just barely. I heard people running around scared and hurried. I kept trying all day to call to them to help me but no use. At one point I saw a helicopter over me and I knew I'd be alright but it only picked up the remaining survivors and took off. I felt very tired and worn out. I knew my body was broken and probably dying. I actually made peace with myself in my dream and drifted off into death. In my head I actually heard a voice tell me in the darkness of my mind, "I'm dead".
I awoke drenched in sweat and too panicked to move. I had to tell myself that is was a dream but it was hard because it felt so real. I couldn't sleep or dream for the rest of the night. I was exhausted the next day, like I had gone through some major ordeal. It was very surreal. Am I plagued by some unforeseen tragic death? Or is it merely my old life's layers peeling away?
My dream started with me on a plane heading home. I had a feeling of accomplishment but that of loneliness as well. I could tell I was decked out in work clothes and I was blankly staring out of the plane. I remember hearing some really loud gasps and then a free fall ensued. I looked out the window and saw that we were going to smash into some trees. I braced myself against the airplane wall and was hurled into every imaginable direction. I woke up looking into the sky. I couldn't figure out why I couldn't move my legs or my arms. I tried to move anything but I couldn't. I could speak but just barely. I heard people running around scared and hurried. I kept trying all day to call to them to help me but no use. At one point I saw a helicopter over me and I knew I'd be alright but it only picked up the remaining survivors and took off. I felt very tired and worn out. I knew my body was broken and probably dying. I actually made peace with myself in my dream and drifted off into death. In my head I actually heard a voice tell me in the darkness of my mind, "I'm dead".
I awoke drenched in sweat and too panicked to move. I had to tell myself that is was a dream but it was hard because it felt so real. I couldn't sleep or dream for the rest of the night. I was exhausted the next day, like I had gone through some major ordeal. It was very surreal. Am I plagued by some unforeseen tragic death? Or is it merely my old life's layers peeling away?
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
I Had A Bad Dream Last Night. I Woke Up Drenched In Sweat.
My entrails bathed in the thorn capped moon high over my mind last night.
And I washed my hands in the golden glue of spring's temptations this morning.
I will melt under thunder and lightning to which god's grand hammer swings tonight.
And I will grow from my lilly white carcass —reaching for happiness in the sorrows of tomorrow.
For what the future's rusty blades hold for me I do not know, but I will live alone... and will I die that same way?
And I washed my hands in the golden glue of spring's temptations this morning.
I will melt under thunder and lightning to which god's grand hammer swings tonight.
And I will grow from my lilly white carcass —reaching for happiness in the sorrows of tomorrow.
For what the future's rusty blades hold for me I do not know, but I will live alone... and will I die that same way?
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Seriously
If I see one more muscle bound douche bag wearing an "affliction" tee I'm going to puke. Even women make fun of how ridiculous it is. Apparently you must get a discount on steroids if you buy the shirt or vice versa. Stop it guys.
Also, if you saw me late last night at Angels Rock Bar it wasn't me, it was my naughty twin.
Also, if you saw me late last night at Angels Rock Bar it wasn't me, it was my naughty twin.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Get Off Your Pedestal & Have A Good Time!
Dear Kate or Katy or Kathy (it was hard to hear what her real name was in the club)
My good friends Adam and Nick were with me at Angels Rock bar last night. We were having a good time drinking beers, watching the Hills Have Eyes, and of course people watching. I couldn't help but notice the same blonde all night. This blonde was a little older and danced around with a certain air of superiority. I continually watched as she flipped back her deep fried dirty blonde curls and roll her eyes at every guy that gave her a smile. Her eyes didn't just roll back either, they would fling back as if the world should kneel at her feet. I was further disgusted by her when she continually made fun of the girls dancing up on the stage. So what if they might be a little heavier or not as pretty. Apparently her idea of a good time was to bring others down and that's a shame. I hate people like that. As the night continued on she was able to work her way in the VIP section without giving any sort of hint that she appreciated the guys that helped pull it off. Numerous men would try to strike up a conversation but she was done with them. I'm sure she was looking for something more than a good time or any type of descent dating prospect. Nope, she was looking for the golden wallet and Abercrombie model all rolled into one. She wanted someone to worship her. By the end of the night I was sober and just having a good time. The woman finally got on a table with her friend and started dancing. She was approached a couple of times but paid no attention. I noticed though that she kept glancing over at me and staring. As she was getting down, so that her and her friends could get out of there, I approached her with this other guy I'd just met. She ignored him but immediately grabbed my hand in this sexy two finger embrace. She smiled for the first time I'd seen that night and we exchanged names. I mentioned to her as she was leaving that maybe if I saw her again there, that she should try smiling more. She gave me the I'm offended okay sign and then left. My goal was not to get her number or do anything except open her eyes to what a fun time she could be having if she would just allow herself to enjoy it. I also felt a sense of accomplishment in that I exchanged names with the biggest she-witch in club and got her to smile. I don't know her, I don't know what she's gone through but I can read people. I can read snotty spoiled real well.
My good friends Adam and Nick were with me at Angels Rock bar last night. We were having a good time drinking beers, watching the Hills Have Eyes, and of course people watching. I couldn't help but notice the same blonde all night. This blonde was a little older and danced around with a certain air of superiority. I continually watched as she flipped back her deep fried dirty blonde curls and roll her eyes at every guy that gave her a smile. Her eyes didn't just roll back either, they would fling back as if the world should kneel at her feet. I was further disgusted by her when she continually made fun of the girls dancing up on the stage. So what if they might be a little heavier or not as pretty. Apparently her idea of a good time was to bring others down and that's a shame. I hate people like that. As the night continued on she was able to work her way in the VIP section without giving any sort of hint that she appreciated the guys that helped pull it off. Numerous men would try to strike up a conversation but she was done with them. I'm sure she was looking for something more than a good time or any type of descent dating prospect. Nope, she was looking for the golden wallet and Abercrombie model all rolled into one. She wanted someone to worship her. By the end of the night I was sober and just having a good time. The woman finally got on a table with her friend and started dancing. She was approached a couple of times but paid no attention. I noticed though that she kept glancing over at me and staring. As she was getting down, so that her and her friends could get out of there, I approached her with this other guy I'd just met. She ignored him but immediately grabbed my hand in this sexy two finger embrace. She smiled for the first time I'd seen that night and we exchanged names. I mentioned to her as she was leaving that maybe if I saw her again there, that she should try smiling more. She gave me the I'm offended okay sign and then left. My goal was not to get her number or do anything except open her eyes to what a fun time she could be having if she would just allow herself to enjoy it. I also felt a sense of accomplishment in that I exchanged names with the biggest she-witch in club and got her to smile. I don't know her, I don't know what she's gone through but I can read people. I can read snotty spoiled real well.
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