And Here Is Where I Try To Make Sense Of Things (Part 7)

By the time the end of the year rolled around we were both fed up. I started working out in the mornings because I had let myself go and was completely miserable with how I looked and felt. I was really busy at work. I finally had my own client and therefore flying out to do presentations more often. I remember flying out for a week and on the flight back getting delayed on the plane for three hours. I came back to do the VML party with all my confidence back. I then took off the next morning to ride out with my buddy Adam to the KU versus Colorado football game in Colorado. I got back home from that and immediately flew back out again for another week. I did a lot of thinking on this trip. It was good for me.

We traveled to my buddies place for the New Year's Eve party. We both smiled and laughed but we were both good at hiding our unhappiness. We left there to go to my parent's place and a large scale battle broke out between the two of us. Everything that could've been said was and even things that shouldn't have been. It was brutal and you could feel that hatred seething. That's when the switch flipped. That's when I knew that once the switch was turned off it was permanent. We got through the rest of the New Years and my birthday. I moved out of the house and into my buddies place. We called it a separation but I never showed any signs of trying to make it work and she got the that. She realized I was done.

We filed for divorce and we put the house on the market. She immediately started dating again. I went through hell carrying the burden of being the initiator of the split. The families blamed me but they never really knew what happened behind closed doors. She found happiness right away having met another teacher she fell head over heals for. She gave me a couple of letters telling me that I was right in what i had done and that she understood it now. She also apologized for not seeing just how many of my dreams and goals I had set aside for her. I am still so happy that she is happy and in love again. I had no issues in taking on the huge responsibility of the split. My shoulders are strong and I could carry that load.